The lanterns marked your journey to the night air around you and to those at your side in the crowd. Who hasn’t been touched by cancer these days?? Where you there supporting (red), surviving (white), or remembering (gold)?
It’s a double edge sword to be so naked with your spot in
life. You want to be proud and
honour the life of your lost one. The person who taught you how to love with
all your heart. The person who
lived for his family and children.
But, to uncover this vulnerability in a crowd of others is
stripping. You feel pity and sadness when you catch
the gaze of others who know why you’re there. You feel as though you’re robbing hope from the ones who
think they can beat it.
I stood and listened to the speakers as they told their
stories of survival, and loss.
I remembered instantly what it was like to live a life consumed by hospital
visits and fatigue. I watched
Audrey and Noah as they listened.
There was no talk of it in the car afterwards, no questions. I was grateful for the reprieve from
answering or having to explain away the why’s of cancer.
There were tears, but just my own as I watched the two of
them navigate the path of lanterns at dusk ahead of me. As we wove through the campus they
talked about what classes they’d like to take when they go to the University of
Victoria.
Then the questions started…Where do you live when you go
away to school? When is lunch hour?
How long is recess?? When is
curfew? (I’m sticking with that
one!) How many books can you take out of the library? Do you get your own computer? We walked past the ocean and earth sciences building and Audrey
declared her major. I think
Mark would be proud of the little individuals they have become. I sure am.
always in our hearts
