Moving forwards...

The time has come for me to make my way back to Ottawa. At the end of the month, Audrey, Noah and I will be moving back. I found a house for us during our trip home last month and we will be on our way on June the 2nd.

It comes at a time when the days feel especially long without Mark. I miss him terribly as do the kids, and our life out here moves along with a large gap in it. Now that some time has passed, I feel ready to embark on what Mark and I decided was the best thing for our family. It will be hard to leave BC, but in our hearts we knew this was what was going to happen. I am grateful Mark had the courage to plan for our future and help me make this incredibly hard decision. I don't think I could have decided something so important without his input. I admire his courage for facing reality and helping me choose where I was going to raise our family even after he was gone.

It might come as a surprise to some that we talked about stuff like this, but I remember the day Mark told me I should move back to Ottawa. As I'm sure you could guess, it was somewhere between VGH and the Portmann bridge. The place where we had so many of these conversations was in our little Golf that we bought together 11 short years ago. By the time we got to that bridge one of us was usually crying and Mark always said..."Why do we have such heavy conversations 15 minutes from home?!" And my response was usually, "You have cancer, why do you think???!!! Even when he was so close to dying, he still wanted to carry on as usual and not get too bogged down with things. He accepted it, helped me to accept it, planned and then said, "Let's get on with things here, we haven't seen the kids all day."

As for our green golf, I have decided to sell it (on Mark's advice of course). It will be hard to see it go but it is an awesome car that has never left me stranded anywhere in the 11 years that I have owned it. And just to add to the list of TO DO's, I have decided to sell our minivan as well. The thought of driving across the country, alone, with two small children just seems crazy.

With so much to do and such a limited amount of oomph, I have neglected my blog, phone calls, thank-you's and much more. I hope to blog more and keep in touch as time goes on. The friends that Mark and I have made out here on the West Coast will be friends for life. I always look forward to your comments and emails so keep in touch and I will promise to do the same.

Leslie